Wednesday, October 11, 2006
I have every intention to close down this blog since it has virtually received zero updates from me ever since I got here to Australia about 9 months ago. I find that with this blog I tend to live in falsehood, to put up a front of what I want others to perceive me as. It helped me connect to people yet the person that they see might not be the real me.
In the past, this blog was used for my muses and rants because oh i was a so ever sensitive person. Not that I am not sensitive now but I think learning to trust God more and walking more in His teachings have made me let go of alot of things. I don't want to be the one in control now because I trust God to take control over my life.
There have been lots of changes this year for me. Lots of growing up and this perhaps, has made me see that there are alot more things in life worth caring about than myself. Therefore, I don't really see the point of me going on about the minute details of superficial things that happen in my life. I want what I write to matter to others, to matter to myself when I read back my thoughts months or years later.I want a blog that will help me remember the things I cherish and hold dear to my heart. Maybe that's why I struggle to be consistent in my blog update this year. Or maybe blogging was just a trend that everyone rushed to catch and then abandon when all becomes too clouded, too much to speak.
But i do want you all to know that i do care for each and everyone of you who have bothered to read my blog so far. maybe i will start a new one when summer holidays(for aust) start so that my mind will be more refreshed and more aware of the exact words I want to say. But for the meantime, I will be MIA for this blog.
Thank you to each and everyone of you who has bothered to read my blog so far.
Love all of you.
Abt 1 month back to home!:)
7:13 PM
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Thursday, September 21, 2006
wake me up when september ends
it was only a few weeks ago when september really begun
spring was in the air
but then the rain came and all was gloomy and cold
all too soon assignments came
exams to top off all of that
rushing through the week
trying to catch my breath
making sense of my life
with all the uncertainties and fears
not knowing myself anymore
doing things irrtational and beyond myself
partying when there's work to be done
that's just so NOT me at all
all too soon I lose myself
and all have been too much to bear
i just need to be home soon
so wake me up when september ends
cos till then there'll only be 2 more months to go
before i am back to all your love again
6:13 PM
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Wednesday, August 23, 2006
*Ten Guidelines From God*
Effective Immediately,please be aware that there are changes YOU needto make in YOUR life. These changes need to becompleted in order that I may fulfill My promisesto you to grant you peace, joy and happiness inthis life. I apologize for any inconvenience,but after all that I am doing, this seems verylittle to ask of you. Please, followthese 10 guidelines
*1.* *QUIT WORRYING*:Life has dealt you a blow and all you do is sitand worry. Have you forgotten that I am hereto take all your burdens and carry them for you?Or do you just enjoy fretting over every little thing that comes your way?
2.* PUT IT ON THE LIST*:Something needs done or taken care of. Put iton the list. No, not YOUR list. Put it on MYto-do-list. Let ME be the one to take careof the problem. I can't help you until you turnit over to Me. And although My to-do-listis long, I am after all... God. I can take care of anything you put into My hands. In fact,if the truth were ever really known, I takecare of a lot of things for you that you never even realize.
3. *TRUST ME:***Once you've given your burdens to Me,quit trying to take them back. Trust inMe. Have the faith that I will take care ofall your needs, your problems and your trials.Problems with the kids? Put them on My list.Problem with finances? Put it on My list.Problems with your emotional roller coaster ?For My sake, put it on My list. I want tohelp you. All you have to do is ask.
4. *LEAVE IT ALONE:***Don't wake up one morning and say,"Well, I'm feeling much stronger now, I thinkI can handle it from here." Why do you thinkyou are feeling stronger now? It's simple.You gave Me your burdens and I'm takingcare of them. I also renew your strengthand cover you in my peace. Don't youknow that if I give you these problems back,you will be right back where you started?Leave them with Me and forget aboutthem. Just let Me do my job.
5.* TALK TO ME*:I want you to forget a lot of things.Forget what was making you crazy.Forget the worry and the fretting becauseyou know I'm in control. But there's onething I pray you never forget. Please, don'tforget to talk to Me - OFTEN! I love YOU!I want to hear your voice. I want you toinclude Me in on the things going on in your life.I want to hear you talk about your friendsand family. Prayer is simply you havinga conversation with Me. I want to be yourdearest friend.
6. *HAVE FAITH:***I see a lot of things from up here that youcan't see from where you are. Have faith inMe that I know what I'm doing. Trust Me;you wouldn't want the view from My eyes.I will continue to care for you, watch over you,and meet your needs. You only have to trust Me.Although I have a much bigger task than you,it seems as if you have so much trouble justdoing your simple part. How hard can trust be?
7.* SHARE:***You were taught to share when you wereonly two years old. When did you forget?That rule still applies. Share with those who areless fortunate than you. Share your joy withthose who need encouragement. Share yourlaughter with those who haven't heard any insuch a long time. Share your tears with thosewho have forgotten how to cry. Share your faithwith those who have none.
8. *BE PATIENT:***I managed to fix it so in just one lifetimeyou could have so many diverse experiences.You grow from a child to an adult, have children,change jobs many times, learn many trades,travel to so many places, meet thousandsof people, and experience so much. How canyou be so impatient then when it takes Mea little longer than you expect to handlesomething on My to-do-list? Trust in Mytiming, for My timing is perfect. Justbecause I created the entire universe inonly six days, everyone thinks I shouldalways rush, rush, rush.
9. *BE KIND:***Be kind to others, for I love them justas much as I love you. They may not dresslike you, or talk like you, or live the same wayyou do, but I still love you all. Please tryto get along, for My sake. I created eachof you different in some way. It would betoo boring if you were all identical.Please, know I love each of your differences.
10.* LOVE YOURSELF:***As much as I love you, how can you notlove yourself? You were created by me forone reason only -- to be loved, and to lovein return. I am a God of Love. Love Me.Love your neighbors. But also love yourself.It makes My heart ache when I see youso angry with yourself when things gowrong. You are very precious to me.Don't ever forget......
7:58 PM
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Sunday, August 20, 2006
time for some updates. sorry for the lack of posts. been busy and was also too lazy to upload picture.lost for words for now too.
FROM SYDNEY
church building frm sydney
clock tower frm sydney
krispy kremes doughnut
FROM IDD
yummy lamb medallion frm IDD: International Dinner & Dance
strawberry chocolate mouse for dessert
me and snow
me and peiweon
supper at cybercity after IDD
FROM NATIONAL DAY CELEBRATION
Jared's baked pasta
My pork and chicken satay
derick's stir-fried beef
shumin's fried bee hoon
wanping's chicken curry
shumin n i
three of us
FROM THE FISHING TRIP AT REDCLIFF
jared n rover
wally with the fish
sunrise
sunrise again
rach n me
no time to describe what i have done. have to complete my assignment. meanwhile, i m remembering all of u and pressing on for nov to come soon! love u all!
6:16 PM
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Tuesday, August 08, 2006
Life has been pretty much of a hectic rush ever since school started. And I was away during the hols so haven't got time to upload pictures from sydney. most frustrating of all is that blogger doesn't really support photo uploading so I had really little to share becos what i have to say are all recorded in photos, vivid and real in themselves.
tomorrow's my first national day away from sgp. will be gg over to david's place to celebrate national day tog with shumin,david, june, rachel, jared?? and i dunno who else. It's a pretty last minute, in-promptu thing. but i must be mad cos my sch ends late tmr and i still have to go home and prepare satay for the party. and i have tons of homework to do!!!but it's national day afterall, time to be a bit more patriotic now that we are away frm home.hopefully we can all watch the live- telcast on the web tog.
will be wearing red and white tmr. asking my frens to do the same too. haha...roar!
bro: happy birthday to u!u r my special boy born on national day!!!haha.hope that u'll enjoy yr day!sorry that i haven't got round to posting u yr card yet but i have bought bdae present for u alr. will try to call home if the party din end too late. love U!
7:05 PM
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Tuesday, July 25, 2006
Trying To Be There
It's been a long time since I last blogged, isn't it? Even my flooble chatbox is gone and I dunno how to reinstate that so I shall just leave it as such. School just started yesterday and these past 2 days have been a blur for me. In fact, I think it is all the hassle of gg back to school again that got me so lost and confused and homesick.
I know that I haven't been doing much to keep up with people as well and that isn't good. I do wish I have more of myself to catch up with everyone but I am like this scattered fragmented person, trying to figure out how to live independently, trying to balance chores and housework and social life and everything else that anyone of you have to deal with.
I don't have much excuse to be away for so long but it's like at times I have so much to say that I dunno how to articulate myself and my thoughts. Everything gets so crammed up inside and sometimes, I don't even think I have half of myself in place anymore. All the mails to reply. All the friends I cherish. Why does it seem like I am always letting them slip by me? I don't want it to be so yet it seems to become more and more like it.
I used to make the effort to be in everyone's life. To take time to show love and concern to all my friends. But now I can only do that for a few people. Because it becomes draining to try to stay in touch when everything is on the go. It's like I am spinning round and round on this carousal that never seems to stop.
Forgive me if I have been an inadequate friend. I am trying my best to be there even though I always seem to be not around.
I hate losing people. especially friends who matter to me. it hurts because each of you are a cherished part of me and losing you is like drilling holes within me. I love all of you, whoever is reading this. Please understand. I can't wait to get home. It's just four more mths to go. Love all of you always.
2:52 PM
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Saturday, June 03, 2006
its freezing out there now, being winter and all with temperature dropping to single digits. feels weird to be wrapped up in a thick winter jacket at home when i wld have been dressed casually in t-shirt and shorts back in sgp. i am frigid and cold....so numb....and still having exams to study for...anyway, i am sorry for the lack of updates dear friends.its really a mad rush trying to complete assignments and studying for exams....my exams only end on 22 june so i guess u all might not see my blog updated for an even longer time...
i think the cold is making me homesick but other than that, i am reasonably happy here except that i cant stop feeling domesticated and wanting to try new recipes which result in absurd stock-up on flour and sauces, but not food or clothes???!!!! sob...
but i did mange to buy some clothes frm harbourtown last time...21 bucks for a nike jacket...is it cheap???i dunno...ok anyway, just to show some proudly tried and tested recipes for recently:
muah chee!!!
grilled tearyali chicken rice with steamed veggy
other pictures:
2:42 PM
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